why cant i get a job?

[BoGun]

fark me. i rite all these aplications for jobs like solisiter, acountant, doctor an' shit but i never even get an interview. wot am i doing rong? i reckon its a government conspirocy to keeps us ppl poor so the rich can feed off us. one day when the revelotion cums we will rise up and kill the rich and then i will be able to be a sergeon and save ppls lives and stuff.

[Miss Dingo]

maybe its cause ya personality dont do shit 4 ya

[OzyGunja]

fark me. i rite all these aplications for jobs like solisiter, acountant, doctor an' shit but i never even get an interview. wot am i doing rong? i reckon its a government conspirocy to keeps us ppl poor so the rich can feed off us. one day when the revelotion cums we will rise up and kill the rich and then i will be able to be a sergeon and save ppls lives and stuff.

Yeah they sound like real Bogan jobs?...LOL

Thats strange Bogun?...Because with Canada being part of the Commonwealth, You would think Australia would recognise your foreign qualifications???.....LOL

You will still be handy in the Revolution though!..haha....We could use another field medic...Have you read "The Turner Diaries"??

[Lil Carnt]

Have you tried applyin for a job at Don or Hans I 'd bet you'd be real good at meat packing, considering your experience wif small goods...Cabana boy.

[BoGun]

Have you tried applyin for a job at Don or Hans I 'd bet you'd be real good at meat packing, considering your experience wif small goods...Cabana boy.

good one pedo. still usin' the pic of a kiddie as ur avy i see. usin' a kiddie pic and talking cock is not a good look unless ur a filthy pedo like u of corse

[Flamin Morry]

Have you tried applyin for a job at Don or Hans I 'd bet you'd be real good at meat packing, considering your experience wif small goods...Cabana boy.

lmao

[beefcurtain]

Well first you have to learn punctuation and grammer to get into those sorts of jobs.

If your post is anything to go by....YOU AINT GOT A FARKIN HOPE IN HELL!!

Then again, you got the personality for a government job and being a foreigner you will get one before any of us Aussie carnts do!!

[BoGun]

Well first you have to learn punctuation and grammer to get into those sorts of jobs.

If your post is anything to go by....YOU AINT GOT A FARKIN HOPE IN HELL!!

Then again, you got the personality for a government job and being a foreigner you will get one before any of us Aussie carnts do!!

i could work in a call centre

[Rudolph Hess]

No you'd be fucking useless at that as well, as you don't speak Hindu

[whitechik]

You could start yer own church?   

[BoGun]

You could start yer own church?   

Why Should I Start My Own Religion?

Before jumping into such a massive undertaking, you must first examine the underlying reasons for actually starting a new religion. Starting a new religion is not for everyone, so consider your motivations carefully. For example, getting high one night and starting a religion based upon the worship of your sacred bong Bertha is not necessarily a good idea. Even if it seems like a good idea at the time, it's almost guaranteed that it won't the next day. If by chance it still does, then you should probably reexamine your lifestyle and consider smoking less pot (or inviting me over more often to share the green). Likewise, schizophrenia and delusions of grandeur are not valid reasons for starting your own religion. Greed, however, is. Starting a new religion in order to gain tax exemption and to launder money from your followers is a perfectly legitimate career option, and one that you are guaranteed not to learn in school.

Where To Begin: Ideas for Starting a New Religion

Even if you are less than creative, there is always the original idea of starting your own religion by deriving it from a preexisting one. Try creating a new Christian sect. For example, Christians for Satan, Satanists for Jesus, Satanist Christians for Brian Boitano, etc.. The possibilities are endless. You could try claiming to be the human incarnate of the messiah visiting Earth to save mankind. Unfortunately, few people will believe you. Only one person has successfully pulled this off and that was over 2,000 years ago. Even then, he had to be crucified and then raised from the dead before anyone would believe him. Not to mention the book they wrote about him, which narrowly missed the bestseller's list, except Oprah picked it up. If you are unsure of your miraculous powers, you may not want to try this. You could choose to worship someone famous as the messiah instead, as people are much more likely to believe in them. Try, for example, Christians for the Worship of David Bowie as the Second Coming of the Messiah.

Attracting Followers:

In order to gain followers, you must promise them something. Fortunately, this can be something entirely intangible, such as eternal happiness in heaven. If this is not enough, threaten them with eternal damnation in the fiery pits of Newark. If you still are having trouble attracting followers, try impressing people with your unusual talents. These can be physical, mental, or supernatural. If you have none of the above, try plastic surgery. Here's an idea: have a plastic surgeon remove your navel so that you can claim that you have no mortal parents and actually sprang forth from the ass of a heavenly creature (say, Madonna).

Erecting a Temple:

Erecting a temple, A.K.A. improving your house, is perhaps the most important step in creating your very own religion. In order to receive tax-exemption, your house must be designated a place of worship. The first step in building a temple is to collect money from your converts. In order to avoid having droves of followers in your house at all time, use a tiny portion of the money to construct a small annex for worshippers and use the rest to construct a swimming pool for yourself. Hold services whenever you need to have the pool cleaned.

Moving to Guam:

It was fun while it lasted, but all good things must end. Eventually the authorities will catch up with you. Therefore, you must prepare in advance. Store excess funds in foreign banks and purchase "vacation" homes in exotic locations. Be sure to book airplane tickets at the first sign of trouble. You may feel that you have lost everything, but on the bright side, you can always start all over again. You now have an untapped pool of ignorant non-believers to spread the good word to. And spread the good word you will, for it is your duty to save the sinner's souls.

[maceygirl]

Shit!  I would forget the church then. 

[redneck carnt]

fark ya talk some shit bogun

[OzyGunja]

Yeah that Boygun faggot really did take the cake for #1 Fuckwit.
But we have had some close contenders for the prize over the years...Benny Profane, The Howards, Neo Nazi Bogan, Uncle Arthur, Shirly Purvis, Scum, Besty, Flies Eyes....all come to mind.
We seem to attract all breeds of fuckwits here!....But they never seem to last long....LOL
Garn Git Farked Ya Paka Carnts!

[redneck carnt]

Yeah that Boygun faggot really did take the cake for #1 Fuckwit.
But we have had some close contenders for the prize over the years...Benny Profane, The Howards, Neo Nazi Bogan, Uncle Arthur, Shirly Purvis, Scum, Besty, Flies Eyes....all come to mind.
We seem to attract all breeds of fuckwits here!....But they never seem to last long....LOL
Garn Git Farked Ya Paka Carnts!

there both annoying but entertaining, at least they get people talking il give'em that.